Bonaire 2016
Happy Summer to all of you!! I hope you are all having a nice and relaxing summer. Our summer has had it's up and downs; this picture is definitely a pic of one of the many ups. This was taken at a beach resort on the small but beautiful island of Bonaire. This was the view as we stepped out of our taxi/minivan. The water was a gorgeous ice blue with the dark blue of the ocean we all know and love. The sand was silky smooth and the water was warm and only waist high. It's what I envision the Garden of Eden would be; perfect and beyond anything I ever thought existed.
Our vacation also included stops in Saint Marten, beautiful Curacao and my favorite Aruba. An amazing vacation made in dreams and we got to share it with special friends. It was a much needed and much deserved time away. We started planning in February and now we are already a month out from leaving. Time sure does fly doesn't it?
As with any highs, our summer did have lows. We experienced some adversity with Emily and her soccer. Even though I think she will be in a better situation, the sting is still lingering. When your child who has experienced a traumatic episode asks you why bad things keep happening to her, how do you answer that? To look into her eyes and see the hurt and pain all over again was heart wrenching. We did get her situation worked out but that sting and the loss of confidence within herself is still there; it's still in the back of her mind. It makes me sad to know that she has been questioning her skills. We just keep open dialogue about how God has got her and that He knows her path. We know that everything will work out for His good so we will trust and keep walking.
So this brings me to a word that we all ask ourselves a lot. That word is WHY!!
Don't you ask yourself that too? Why did my husband have to be the one to leave me and his family before he should have? Why does my child(ren) have to grow up without their dad? Why do I have to raise my child on my own and have to answer her tough questions by myself? Why did this happen to us?
I answer the only way I know how this side of Heaven; God knows the Why and maybe we aren't meant to know right now or at all. God sees the entire picture and we can only see little slices. I do know that we must have faith and trust in His plan.
How hard is this?!! Very hard!!
It calls for patience and endurance; faith and trust; praying and meditating. You have to realize that you are not in control; God is. God has carved our paths and we must discipline ourselves to get on that path and follow it. We must know that God works everything for our good; according to His purpose. So along this path, we must give Him the praise and glory. God is for us; not against.
It seems that since we have been home and actually during our cruise; the world has become more of a mess than ever. The attack at the Turkey airport happened while we were gone. We sat and watched some of the coverage and one of the stories was a young mom that was killed while holding her little child. This really hit home with Emily and she cried asking me why yet again. Once again I was left trying to answer that one word that can't be answered. I seen the grief pain once again in her eyes. We all know that look very well because we see that in our own eyes in the mirror.
Once we got home, it seemed all hell broke loose, literally. With the recent attacks and violence here in our own country, I find myself asking God WHY? Why does the death, grief, and violence continue? He reminds me though that we do live in a fallen world and this was foretold in the Bible. I also am reminded that Jesus has won the war but the battles do rage on.
So here are some of my WHYs answered:
I do know that my God is bigger than any adversity we can face. I know that He has already won.
I do know that my God is for us so who can be against us.
I do know that my God loves me even when I am one big mess of sin.
I do know that I am His child and He is my Father.
I do know that Jesus defeated the grave and that He wants me to leave my burdens at the cross.
So when you are left standing or on your knees pleading the word WHY...remember the truths above. The only way I have made it this far on my journey is to focus on the truths that I do believe and hold near my heart. My soul thirsts for His truth and He fills me when I am on empty. I pray that when you feel you are on the fumes of life and going any farther is hard to bear, just look up and say thank you Lord or simply whisper Jesus. He will hear and answer your pleas.
Lord, thank you for blessing Emily and me with an amazing family and incredible friends. Thank you for blessing us with our trip and getting to visit the paradises you created. Lord please help us to remember that You have won the war. It's so important to remember that every day, especially when life doesn't go as planned. Thank you for the adversity Father because without adversity how would we ever praise and thank you for the beautiful moments. This world can turn upside in a second, but You are faithful and never change. Thank you Lord!! Lord I pray everything I say, write and my actions are only to glorify You and Your precious name. Amen!!
