Memories

Memories...

We all have them.  Some of our memories are sweet and endearing, some are hard and traumatic.  There are times that I sit and reminisce; others sneak up from out of nowhere and leave me breathless.  Either way, they are memories that we all hold dear and have become a part of us.

While Emily was on spring break this week, we took a day trip with our good friends and my niece to St. Louis.  It's about a 3 1/2 hour trip from Indy to the Gateway to the West.  We enjoyed a great day at the City Museum, the zoo, and the Arch.  It was a beautiful, enjoyable day.  On our way home, Paula and I started talking about long road trips that we have done.  Seeing all the semis on the highway brought up a lot of memories of the trips Kirk and I went on during my time driving with him.  Once I starting talking, I kept remembering all the fun times he and I had on the road. 

We drove together for about three years off and on as a team.  We were owner/operators and owned a couple more semis that members of his family drove for us.  Kirk and I traveled all over the country.  I never got any farther west than Arizona; however we did go to Idaho once.  We did travel to the Carolinas and Pennsylvania but never farther east.  I've been to Laredo, El Paso, Ft. Dodge, New Orleans, Denver, Phoenix just to name a few cool spots.  We did travel through Roswell, New Mexico.  We ate at a truck stop that was decked out in everything alien.  Very cool but strange place.  I talked to Paula about seeing all these places and getting to see roadrunners.  Yes they really do exist; however no Wile E Coyote was out there with them. It was fun just to sit and talk about Kirk and our life while we got to travel. 

I will admit at the time I hated being away from home.  I hated packing up and leaving home to be gone for a week at a time.  The second that Kirk went to his Heavenly home, I cherished every second he and I spent together out on the road.  Every long and deep discussion we had I now hold dear to my heart.  There were no smart phones to interrupt or occupy our time together.  And believe it or not, we never fought even though we were confined to a small space.  The places I saw, the people I met, would have never happened had I not left my life behind here in Indy and went out with him on the open road.  I would have never seen the Rocky Mountains, the beautiful Arizona landscape, the green pastures of Idaho, the amazing sky in Wyoming, Wyatt Earp's Ft. Dodge, or Lake Pontchartrain.  I would have missed those three years with him; Kirk drove for many years and was gone quite a bit.  So many days we missed being together, so many moments we didn't get to share.  I hated to see him leave, and loved to hear those words, "I'm on my way home." 

In Philippians 1:3 NIV it says, "I thank my God every time I remember you."  I have this verse on our headstone that we share.  I do thank my God that He blessed me with Kirk.  I do thank my God for blessing me with these precious memories of him.  Not very many couples have worked together as team truck drivers and were able to stay married.  I got to go on so many adventures with Kirk and got to see so many neat places.  I feel so blessed to have shared that time of our life together. 

Do you have special memories of your beloved?  Do you sit and remember those stolen moments you shared?  Have you shared those memories with your family/friends/children?  If you haven't, please do so.  It's part of the healing process.  If you still feel it's too painful to travel down memory lane, that is fine.  You will get there.  As time goes on, you will feel more like sharing because those memories keep your loved ones alive in you.  You will always carry your husbands memories in your heart.  God blessed us with our husbands and He wants to see us rejoice.  God does see us in our grief, He knows our sorrow.  But he also knows that we will feel joy again.  In John 15:22 NIV we see, "So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy." 

YES!!!  We have the promise that if we are saved we will not only get to see Jesus, we will also get to see our husbands that have gone Home before us.  Jesus hears our cries and He promises us that we will rejoice again.  Isn't that amazing?!!! 

For right now, sharing memories and remembering the life we shared with our husbands is a true blessing.  I have found that I love to talk about Kirk and the life we shared together.  Emily likes to hear about stories of our life before she added ten fold to our world.  As time has marched on, I have found it easier to share.  Coming out of my widow fog has made it easier to remember and share.  Will you bless someone by sharing your stories? 

Lord, thank You for blessing me with a life rich in love and memories.  I pray that as time goes on and more memories emerge I will find it easy to share.  I want to bless Emily and my family and friends with wonderful memories of Kirk's life.  I pray that others can start to find it easier to share their stories too.  It will mean so much for so many others.  Lord thank You for Kirk; without him I would not have been blessed with Emily.  In Your Precious Name..Amen!!